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This was sent to me by an internet friend I know only as, "Ranger". It is a poem he wrote for Joel.

 

For Joel

Drifting pleased in observation.
Time distracts weak spirits,
that's how we get ghosts.
Look for me high, though,
floating forever aware in the cosmos.

Heather-Ann Bartlett. The last person to see my boy alive as she spewed her venomous words on him. She wrote in her MySpace blog - "I said things to him before he left that I didn't mean to say."

They typically walked across the PE field together before seventh period. Joel had English class in a portable and Heather had no seventh period. Her car was parked in student parking just beyond the portables. From what I can tell they normally were all smiles as they parted. This was not the case that day, Thursday May 14, 2009. Their conversation wasn't fun and it wasn't loving. Only Heather knows what she said to him that made him leave.

Sunday, May 10th - Mother's Day. Joel worked that day. He was beginning his second week at Cobb Theaters. I don't remember where Heather worked but she was constantly feeling ill and often missed work... as she did on May 10th. I took my wife to the beach for Mother's Day and was unaware of what I'm about to write until after Joel had died. My heart aches for not knowing what was going on with him. Joel wrote in his journal that Heather always made him feel like shit and it would appear that May 10th was no exception. Heather didn't feel well enough to go to work but she ended up spending the day and evening with a couple other guys loitering at some parks around town. Joel found out about it and confronted her over e-mail.

Joel (May 11): did you ever feel good enuf to go into work on sun? I didnt get to talk to you much that day.
Heather: no. i never went. 
Joel: O, what did you go do?
Heather: i went to subway. was there for like an hour. and then just went to a park and talked to reject  [a nickname for the boy she was with] all night. i found out a bunch of stuff about kevin i had been suspicious about but were confirmed last night. but its okay. then we went to another park and talked more and i went home.
Joel: i was just wondering why you didnt want me with you yesterday.
Heather: I never said i didnt want you with me.
Joel: I know you didnt say it. but I felt like it the etire time scence sat after I got off work...

then sun. you didnt feel good a wernt going to work and all of a suden I call and that one short kid answerd you phone, then you come by my house just to get your card and didn't tell me were you were going or ask if I wanted to come. so I felt like you had enuf of me.

so all of today I have been over analizing everything and basicly just torchering myself over it. I dont mean too I just do it to my self I dont know why. I realy missed you.
Heather: im sorry you feel this way.

the reason he answered my phone is bc we were at carter road and i was up a sand dune really high and my phone was on the ground and he was down there.

well i went to get my card i thought you were coming. when you came out with no shirt and just handed it to me i figured you were busy.

not my fault.

"Not My Fault," She said. Joel broke up with her but then regretted it. And from what I can tell she made him pay for breaking up with her. He told her he had made a mistake and didn't want to break up. "Not My Fault." She said.

Joel promised her that he'd write her senior report for her. The senior report is a requirement for graduation. He had completed his and was now doing hers for her. There were guidelines for the report the teacher printed out for the students. Joel apparently had her guidelines. Heather came by our house at 3:15 Thursday, May 14th asking for Joel. I told her I thought he was with her since he didn't show up after school for me to pick him up. She looked upset and I asked what the problem was. She said he had her senior report guidelines and without them she couldn't graduate. She said Joel told her he left them outside the portable for her to pick up. She evaded all my questions about why Joel would have her guidelines and why they would be outside the portable so I told her I'd help her find them and followed her to the school. In her car with her was a boy I'd never seen before. I later found out he was the kid they called, "Reject".  So Heather, Reject, and I looked around for the papers. After repeated questioning from me she told me they'd be in his backpack. But Joel had his backpack. She was talking in circles. I went to the school office to see if someone had found Joel's backpack. The office was locked up and no one was there. She said she was going across the street to look for Joel and I told her I'd go home in case he was there. Once home I found the papers on Joel's desk. But they had Josh Conley's name on them. I called her and told her what I had found and she came to collect them shortly. It was then with my questioning she revealed to me that Joel had broken up with her a few days before. When asked why, she said she didn't know. She was being veague and I became suspicious of her. I asked her if she still had Joel's journal. She opened her trunk and there was his green journal lying on the carpet lining. I asked her if she had read it. She said no she hadn't had time. I knew she had it in her possession for about six weeks yet she hadn't found the time to read it. Joel also had a red journal that was the second of the two. She said she didn't know where that one was.

She left with Josh's guideline papers and I came inside and read the last entry of Joel's journal. It said how happy he was with Heather and how he hoped he could show her she could trust him as she had trust issues with every other boyfriend. In that last entry he stated his hopes for a bright future that would include Heather. I called her and asked if she had read that entry. No, she said. I read it to her and then asked her how it went from this to breaking up a few days ago. She said she didn't know. I asked her if she had any idea where Joel was. She said no.